Wedding Schpiel.....What's Yours?

When I am doing a garter toss I say something like this after I have all da men down on the floor,,,

"Ok Brian (groom) now befoe you get started, there are a few rules that go along with what you are about to do..... Rule number 1, is that a woman likes to have her man on his knees, so you need to get on your knees in front of your WIFE.. (I emphasize WIFE for dramatic effect) am I right ladies? (I ask and gets lots of hollars from da babes! LOL)....... Rule 2, and this actually comes from one of your groomsmen, and I won't say who, but he has a big smile on his face (I'm lieing at this point, but it makes it sound more personal I think)... he says that you get extra points for doing this, with NO hands! I don't care what you use, but no hands! (more hoots and hollars).... (and as the noise dies down, I talk softly)......and the third thing I want you to think about, (talking softly) is to keep in your mind, just pretend, that you are all alone, it's just you and Betty, and you know what (pause) you are married now so you can do anything you want, it's legal! Go for it!....

Then I play Leggs, or The Stripper or whatever song they have picked out...

Now, I don't do this all the time, but 80% of the time I do and it seems fun.

I know some will be offened by it. But that's just me......

So what schpiels do you use that are fun?

When I am doing a garter toss I say something like this after I have all da men down on the floor,,,

"Ok Brian (groom) now befoe you get started, there are a few rules that go along with what you are about to do..... Rule number 1, is that a woman likes to have her man on his knees, so you need to get on your knees in front of your WIFE.. (I emphasize WIFE for dramatic effect) am I right ladies? (I ask and gets lots of hollars from da babes! LOL)....... Rule 2, and this actually comes from one of your groomsmen, and I won't say who, but he has a big smile on his face (I'm lieing at this point, but it makes it sound more personal I think)... he says that you get extra points for doing this, with NO hands! I don't care what you use, but no hands! (more hoots and hollars).... (and as the noise dies down, I talk softly)......and the third thing I want you to think about, (talking softly) is to keep in your mind, just pretend, that you are all alone, it's just you and Betty, and you know what (pause) you are married now so you can do anything you want, it's legal! Go for it!....

Then I play Leggs, or The Stripper or whatever song they have picked out...

Now, I don't do this all the time, but 80% of the time I do and it seems fun.

I know some will be offened by it. But that's just me......

So what schpiels do you use that are fun?

I just might steal yours.... I'm still developing my schtick...:sqbiggrin:

It's all about sharing...... take it, tweek it, make it your own....

No set spiel here.

Might be good, but I've noticed that the whole garter / bouquet thing is quickly dying in my area. ( Not just when I have DJ'd, but even when I am just a guest )..... I would say 25% or so no longer do it at all...

I have no specific thing to say. I just kind of go with the flow of the party.

This is a routine I learned from John Mixon:

When the groom is kneeling to remove the garter, use the mic to say "(groom's name), I want you to remember this position. It's a position you will be spending a lot of your married life in. 'I'm sorry, Baby. I didn't mean to do that. What did I do wrong again?'"

Then there's the old standby: "What's a matter, (groom's name)? Can't you find it?"

Or "Hey! Get your hand outta there."

:D

I agree Papa, there are fewer here as well,,,, but I have a hard time believing that you change your speell (LOL) everytime you do do one....

You must have an idea or an outline that you catch yourself saying....

I remember back in the day, when I saw Van Halen on their "Diver Down" tour,,,, and at one point David acts like some guy is giving him crap from the from row and he says.... "Yeah, well I'm gonna fu%# your girlfriend tonight!" I thought it was the funniest thing I heard and how cool it was that he smacked that guy down, only to hear that he said that most every show!

LOL Even David has a schiepelllll...

Might be good, but I've noticed that the whole garter / bouquet thing is quickly dying in my area. ( Not just when I have DJ'd, but even when I am just a guest )..... I would say 25% or so no longer do it at all...

We're seeing a drop off also, maybe not to the same numbers you're experiencing.

I have no specific thing to say. I just kind of go with the flow of the party.

That's what I was trying to say!



Thank, Mr. Papa/Chuck:sqwink:

Fred... if it gets really good and he is having fun and taking his time, I will say.... Ummmm,, he's not really looking for the garter is he?"....

Or sometimes I'll say if it gets wild..... "goodnight ladies and gents,, we're done here!".... LOL

Well, I don't do many weddings, so I never have really developed a pattern. Personally, I wish they would go the way of the dinosaur. I hate doing them. ( garter and bouquet, I mean, not weddings )

Weddings are a pain in a lot of ways, but they are most DJs bread and butter.... I wish I could have all my weddings be like last night, that would be cool!

Weddings are a pain in a lot of ways, but they are most DJs bread and butter.... I wish I could have all my weddings be like last night, that would be cool!

Read my edit in the above post, Chuck.

Garter Toss

I have the groom put some granny panties up his sleeve. When he has his hand underneath the bride’s dress, he pulls out the granny panties. The crowd goes wild. This works if the bride has a sense of humor. This is not for every couple.

Money Dance

I announce, “If you are short of cash, the bride and groom take Visa, MasterCard, or American Express.”

I have that sample where they had the guys say,,,, "Guys if you wanna dance with the bride, she'll dance with you all night long, but you got to have Visa, because she doesn't take the American Express card, Visa, it's everywhere you wanna be" LOL

Well, I don't do many weddings, so I never have really developed a pattern. Personally, I wish they would go the way of the dinosaur. I hate doing them. ( garter and bouquet, I mean, not weddings )
Then how can ya justify the L1 purchase? ;)

Then how can ya justify the L1 purchase? ;)

I wanted them. :sqbiggrin:

I attended a reception for a friends son ... The DJ announced that since Allen was now married.. everyone who had a key to his apartment should now return them to him...

About a half a dozen girls slowly stood up and walked forward and each one laid a key on the table in front of Allen... as the last girl was walking back to her seat one guy stood up and walked up to the table.. hesitated a moment before he laid down a key and returned to his seat... everyone at the reception cracked up clapping and laughing....

When I am doing a garter toss I say something like this after I have all da men down on the floor,,,

"Ok Brian (groom) now befoe you get started, there are a few rules that go along with what you are about to do..... Rule number 1, is that a woman likes to have her man on his knees, so you need to get on your knees in front of your WIFE.. (I emphasize WIFE for dramatic effect) am I right ladies? (I ask and gets lots of hollars from da babes! LOL)....... Rule 2, and this actually comes from one of your groomsmen, and I won't say who, but he has a big smile on his face (I'm lieing at this point, but it makes it sound more personal I think)... he says that you get extra points for doing this, with NO hands! I don't care what you use, but no hands! (more hoots and hollars).... (and as the noise dies down, I talk softly)......and the third thing I want you to think about, (talking softly) is to keep in your mind, just pretend, that you are all alone, it's just you and Betty, and you know what (pause) you are married now so you can do anything you want, it's legal! Go for it!....

Then I play Leggs, or The Stripper or whatever song they have picked out...

Now, I don't do this all the time, but 80% of the time I do and it seems fun.

I know some will be offened by it. But that's just me......

So what schpiels do you use that are fun?

Last night (saturday) when i did the garter.. i said "wow this feels almost criminal" and the guests went nuts...

http://i228.photobucket.com/albums/ee317/1stcarolina/gigphotosadded42708/djthrough426708113.jpg

Like i Said he is just turning 19 and she is 17 and they both said theyve been carded at a rated R movie.

I attended a reception for a friends son ... The DJ announced that since Allen was now married.. everyone who had a key to his apartment should now return them to him...

About a half a dozen girls slowly stood up and walked forward and each one laid a key on the table in front of Allen... as the last girl was walking back to her seat one guy stood up and walked up to the table.. hesitated a moment before he laid down a key and returned to his seat... everyone at the reception cracked up clapping and laughing....

That was one of my favorite bits...it's even funnier when you have a pregnant woman come up before the guy. I would also include a member of the wait staff or bartender if possible.

Howdy,

The panties are cool. You can also use a "No Trespassing" sign. THAT works well.

IF the b&g want the garter toss, I tell everyone:

"Men are not conditioned to catch a piece of cloth traveling through the air. There is NEVER a time in our lives that this happens. So, with that in mind, we're gonna put the garter on a football. I KNOW someone will catch that"

If you want to target one of the men in the group, just say: "Let's test this out, shall we?" Ted, let's try it with you ok? Then, throw it to Ted and say: "That worked. No need to do another. Great Ted!"

Dave

Assume the position.

If the groom is taking quite awhile pulling off the garter with his teeth, I'll walk over and asks if he needs a flashlight...(I carry a small Maglite with me).
It usually gets a laugh.

At the toss:

Gentlemen, I need you to tak this oath. It is a requirement.

Raise your right hand. (Invariably one will start to raise his left.) Your other right hand. Now, recite after me.

I, state your name... (Some will have ssen Animal House or Blazing Saddles too often and will say "state your name". Just go with it.) Should I catch the garter... promise not no ... hang the garter from my car mirror.

I think I got that from a guy who's initials are the same as Kitchen Patrol.

When I am doing a garter toss I say something like this after I have all da men down on the floor,,,

"Ok Brian (groom) now befoe you get started, there are a few rules that go along with what you are about to do..... Rule number 1, is that a woman likes to have her man on his knees, so you need to get on your knees in front of your WIFE.. (I emphasize WIFE for dramatic effect) am I right ladies? (I ask and gets lots of hollars from da babes! LOL)....... Rule 2, and this actually comes from one of your groomsmen, and I won't say who, but he has a big smile on his face (I'm lieing at this point, but it makes it sound more personal I think)... he says that you get extra points for doing this, with NO hands! I don't care what you use, but no hands! (more hoots and hollars).... (and as the noise dies down, I talk softly)......and the third thing I want you to think about, (talking softly) is to keep in your mind, just pretend, that you are all alone, it's just you and Betty, and you know what (pause) you are married now so you can do anything you want, it's legal! Go for it!....

Then I play Leggs, or The Stripper or whatever song they have picked out...

Now, I don't do this all the time, but 80% of the time I do and it seems fun.

I know some will be offened by it. But that's just me......

So what schpiels do you use that are fun?

I almost stole this verbatium.... and it went over very well especially the part about him being on his knees and belonging there.... they roared for that.... and he did go up there and get it with his teeth with just a little motivation... and I got him to shake his head while still under there..... lol

well you Hoosiers know a good thing when you read it!! My parents are from Evensville BTW.... glad it worked!

I couldn't use the groomsman part so I simply said "Rule #2.... and this comes from your best man... he says that you can't do this with out your hands... so... Rule #2 is NO hands.... I don't care how you do it just don't do it with your hands..."

I forgot the third part... but it was cool.... they loved it!

Just before the groom removes the garter I like to suprise him with, " Hey (groom) how bout giving (bride) a little pre garter dance?" Que a song quickly.

Depending on what happens next,

No dance- stop music and I say "Guess not"
Some bad dance- Stop music and I say, "that will be enough of that"
Fun dance- allow it to go until it gets stale. Sometimes I am suprised at how entertaining this can get.

Paul

Paul, what songs work with that?

Im Too Sexy Right-Said Fred was the first thought here.

Jon is right on target!

Sometimes i will play the same song I use for the ladies to come out before the bouqet toss.

or Macho man!

or something sexy like Let's get it on.

Paul

Before the groom shoots the bouquet I do the count down as I get to 2 and he is getting ready to shoot it, I stop him and say " You know it is a proven fact that how far you shoot the garter has direct correlation to how well you perform tonight, so shoot far my son".

Everyone roars...

:sqlaugh: For some reason this popped into my head last Sat... I did it after I got all the men on the dancefloor and the groom was there, he knelt down to soon, I told him to stand back up,,,, I said..... "what? are you in a hurry here? Something you wanna do? Well I think it is time for you to do a little something for Rachel. I think before you get the garder, that you need to show her a little dance. Whatta ya think fellows? Show her how sexy you are" cue "I'm Too Sexy"

it was great!!! Funny, he got a kick and it was all good.... mahalo for this idea....



Just before the groom removes the garter I like to suprise him with, " Hey (groom) how bout giving (bride) a little pre garter dance?" Que a song quickly.

Depending on what happens next,

No dance- stop music and I say "Guess not"
Some bad dance- Stop music and I say, "that will be enough of that"
Fun dance- allow it to go until it gets stale. Sometimes I am suprised at how entertaining this can get.

Paul

Just saw this right now, but I usually take of my tie off and tell everyone this will be more fun if the groom was blindfolded. I then blind fold the groom and have one of the groomsmen sit in place of the bride. BUt the the bride will be right thers to brush here dress against his arm or hold his hand so he thinks its her. Its wild when he first touches the leg and its super hairy and you can just see the shock on his face. Then I say for real this time and let the bride sit down. Goes pretty well.

Nothing Special but I did have a wedding with the props under the garter chair. They used a wine bottle, their dogs toy and a roll of TP. People seemed to enjoy it.