excessive do not play list

Have a client that's been booked for a while....he emails me with a list of songs that says:
your do not play list on the website only goes to 20 songs...below are more songs i don't want played.
the list has like 60 more songs.

I think i will email him back and tell him we will do our best, but cannot promise that not one of those songs aren't played.

thoughts?

Lemme guess, the do not play list is just about everything that makes a party fun, right?

Hey, let's have a wedding, invite everyone we know, and then bore them to tears with a musical education, rather than throw a great party with lots of well known party tunes.

Yes, I remember getting these types of playlists. Ugh. Good luck, Scott.

Does the bride know of this list? Give her a call.

That is why on my contract it says, Must play and Do not play lists are limited to 10 songs. Any more than that will be at the discretion of the DJ.

Some thing like that. I am paraphrasing.

The main thing for me is the must play. I tell them if alot of the songs I would normally play anyways, I am more lienient to the number.

I always tell them to consider that some popular party songs they might not like, but their guests do.

Karl

We limit at 10 also.
I can't keep track of 100 songs when I'm mixing on the fly. Just won't happen.

As Randy said, ask the bride.

Have you discussed the list with him? If some are popular party dances, ask him to take the guests into consideration. I had one groom that absolutely hated the Electric Slide but the bride loved it. He left the room when we played it and returned when it was over. This solution could be applicable in his case.

Lastly, ask why. Maybe there's a sentimental reason or some of the songs brings back bad memories. You won't know till you ask.

The reason I asked if the bride knew was I had this happen once. The groom sent me an email with all the 'do-not-play or else' songs. I called up the bride who was at home at the time. I politely went thru my spill about having the ability to keep the guests as happy as possible and many of the songs that they didn't want played would be requested. She told me to hang on.....I could hear her cup the phone and say something to him about what I was talking about.....a few minutes later, she's on the phone telling me to play what I feel is the best to keep the party going.

I guess I'm the Lone Wolf here (sorry Fred) I don't advertize a do not play list, but when asked, or given, I feel that it is their wedding and they want it a certain way and that's what I do "True Personalized Service"

I have got lists that I have said something to, just to see where they are coming from, but I would never say to a B&G having got the list, that I will try and not play a song they dont want.

Mixing on the fly? How can you be sure that you don't throw in a song that has dirty words? I mean unless you are like me and I don't even carry them.

It is our job to know what we are playing.

ALL my songs are "Radio Freindly" so bad words ar enot an issue, but when they give you SOOOOO many do-not-play songs....it's difficult to check the list after you have loaded up a song and then checked to see if it's on the list. Unless you pre program the evening...you might accedently let one slip by.
Yes...it's "Their" night....but 100 DO-NOT-PLAY"s?????
Seems a little eccessive.

I think I recommeded you for this one because I wouldn't take it. LOL (Just kidding).

I limit my list to ten songs max. I have a job to do and it's to entertain their guests. If I'm too restricted, I will decline to work with them.

Yes! You don't have to take the gig! But that depends on if you find out before the contract is signmed, sealed and delivered....

I had a wedding, that the bride wouldn't let me play anything but 80's music.

It was not my booking, (I was helping put a friend)

This was the WORST reception i've ever seen.

The B&G alienated all of the guests with there crappy "do not play" list,

And had i known.................I would have stayed home...

Better you, than me!!!:sqfrown:

Blackballing sixty-plus tracks does seem excessive and worrisome. I am in agreement with the rest ~ there has to be a reason why. And it may not be good. Please, don't wait 'til the show to find yourself in the middle of a request war. :eek:

One thing we have figured out over the years: A do-not-play track in specific could mean do-not-play in general. For example, if a B&G say they don't wish Strokin' to be played, this could (and often is) to be interpreted by the DJ that no tracks that are similar in nature to Strokin' will be tolerated, period.

That covers a lot of music... booty, line dance, some older Motown to name a few. We can always say "This song was not on your do not play list" only to hear "But it's the same thing. Cut it off right now."

I wish you well with this one, my friend. :)

So what songs were on the NO PLAY list? I've only had a few give exact examples. Most of my NO PLAY requests are things like 'NO RAP' or 'NO CUSS WORDS' one was 'NO MICHAEL JACKSON'

I have a wedding that has just one requested no play... the Black Eyed Peas - My Humps.... you know I probably wouldn't have played it anyway as I can't stand the song myself.

years ago I did a wedding where all the Bride wanted was Elvis and all the Groom wanted was Creedence Clearwater Revival.... yep 4 hours of Creedence Elvis v Creedence Elvis Creedence Elvis

and the guests were able to celebrate with the couple? What a concept. IF only people were made aware ( I mention it throughout the evening in an encouraging way to the guests) of this concept and could grasp the fact its their day and we should help celebrate their way.

Gigs like that, are only a matter of time, to explode...Something along the way is bound to potentially back fire.

In twenty two years of doing weddings, I have encountered the following:

1) A bride that all she wanted was “high energy” (she was Hispanic and he was Arabian) they met at a club and somehow they formed their relationship around the dance floor. When I asked the bride all the “what if’s” regarding requests. She clearly stated, this is my wedding. Needless is to say, people begged me all night long, to change the thumping “shinny disco balls” beat, but I had to decline, and made no exceptions. People left early, and she had the audacity to say it was my entire fault. I tolerated all her lip, and everything, until she claimed I didn’t return all of her CDS (twelve to be exact) something deep inside of me told me to type all the titles, and have the person who received them sign it off, but the bride didn’t know that, and she was just bluffing, I kindly and calmly said to her: “I know it’s your night, and you should be happy, but since you’re already bitter: Here’s the signature, go bark elsewhere and leave me alone”. She didn’t utter another word. (you may think it was rude, but she don’t have to insinuate I was stealing cd’s from her)
2) A bride who gave me a 30 do not play list. The moment she sent me the list, I thought she had issues. So I went in with a plan, and to prevent myself from playing any song on that list I had to constantly be checking it. Later on that night she told people the dj (me) was drinking alcohol. Just because many left their beer bottles on a side of the stage that was a blind spot, to me. I had to let that one go, simply because she was on a war path with everyone involved, caterer, bartenders, video…etc.
3) Last but not least. A bride who gave me a “must play” list of 50 songs, but failed to tell me she wanted me to play them in a roll and in the order she wrote them out. So all night long she kept saying: “is that song in my list? I noticed she was very drunk, so drunk she was stumbling quite noticeably, I had to tell others to keep her away from me. However she kept sending me people to tell me what to play, her entire bridal party came with a request. She forgot she wrote certain songs and she would yell across the room: “Hey that’s not on my list”!! What made it worse, was the fact that she made it seem like I didn’t know what I was doing, despite the fact that all night long the dance floor was full, and despite the fact that her own family, her father, her mother, her grandmother and her sister, came by to compliment my music and to offer an apology for their “baby’s” erratic behavior. To make matters worse, there were four flights of stairs, no elevators, two systems, one on the fourth deck (ceremony and cocktails), and one on the third deck (main reception). Had so much equipment to move without a helper, he came late and the Yacht left. At the end of the night I ended up leaving a few items by mistake, and lost them completely. I left a fog machine, 2 100ft. cables, 2 tripods and one light.

By far the worst event of my life.

Yes 60 to 100 songs seems excessive. In the final planning meeting we let them know that 7 to 10 songs for do not play. Thats usually understood. I agree that a call should be made to clearify the amount.

Devils advocate here......60 to 100 songs on donot play list.....many djs advertise they have 10,000 to 20,000 songs.....surely you can come up with some more dance tunes that would satisfy people....we are professionals right? This might be challenging but probly not impossible....I think most of us could pull this off.

i LIKE THE PREVIOUS POST.

At old company i used to work for , we had a plan.

We never denied service, to anyone, but we had the "as$H0le fee" policy.

Whenever some one asked for something far and beyond the normal we applied the A.F.

good reading ya all:sqbiggrin:

I don't limit 'Do Not Play' lists. I tell the client that's for songs that typically bring up bad memories. Song they shared with ex's, etc. I let them limit in other ways though - no wedding 'cheese', etc.

I have enough music I can play lots of stuff from their 'nice to hear list' that should keep the party going.

Working a crazy playlist like that is all about communicating with them and getting creative with what they DO want.

I don't put any limits on the "Do Not Play" list but I'm more likely to get types of songs (rap, heavy metal) than specific titles. Usually the specific titles are the cheesy cliche tunes (Celebration, Macarena, Chicken Dance, etc.) or a few that might have "bad memories" for the B&G such as a song that reminds them of a former lover).

I do think that the better the rapport and relationship you have with your client, the less likely they are to give you a laundry list of "do not play" titles. If you convey to them that you're on the same page in terms of the atmosphere they want to create...they will trust you to use your professional judgement to program the event.I had a wedding, that the bride wouldn't let me play anything but 80's music.Seems like that would be pretty easy! Between 1980 and 1989 you have all kinds of genres of hit music...fast, slow, rock, dance, even some music that sounds like it's from another era (like Stray Cats).

If a client came at me with a huge "do not play" list I would try to find out the reason they thought such a list was necessary. I would think a DJ who conveyed their professionalism should be able to talk the client out of it.

Dan we agree on this 100%. Ihave actually enjoyed reading that some have had troubles with a list of this size or the list of must plays. The first thing I establish is the parameters. Goes something like this.
me: So you are adamant about this list? Even if your guests request any of these song? and so on. I also make certain in the initial conversation what the hopes for their day is with their guests at the reception. 99% of the time they say they want to celebrate and have fun and share the fun with all of their guests.

Dan, And JT.

My post was about a wedding that i "helped" a friend with.

I had no contact with bride and groom at all. I showed up there with just my 'puter, and was totally blind-sided with this "list", Which i knew nothing about, Untill it was show time.

Had i had time to prepare, things would have been a bit different....

Playing at a wedding last Saturday, (second wedding for both B&G) I was told not to play "you are my lady" by F.J. because it was the groom's first wedding theme.

As time went by there was a cute couple of kids (3-5) year old, slow dancing on the middle of the dance floor, even to fast music they kept dancing slow, at that moment, the groom's mother asked me to play "unchained melody" for the kids, and so I did,...

The maid of honor, came running to ask me to stop it, because that was the BRIDE'S first dance song from her first marriage.... Luckily I still had "brown eyed girl" on the first deck...!!!

(i did not know):sqerr:

LOL... I have a wedding next weekend. I spoke to the bride today.... She did have a small - maybe 8 song DNP list. However she said I can play anything on the list if requested EXCEPT The Macarena.... Now, I love her quote on this:

"If my 65 year old grandmother is standing in front of you, looking like she will die in the next 5 minutes, and her last request is to hear the Macarena, tell her "request denied"! :sqlaugh: :sqlaugh: :sqlaugh: